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Why you are not successful in your career or life is a sobering question. Especially when you’ve done the usual grind like working hard, investing time, and building the right connections. Do not fret though. The reasons could be much more basic, intrinsic, and foundational than you think. And you can do something about it.
A few possible reasons you are not successful in your career or life are:
- you are not using your Unfair Advantage
- you are not working the magic of Serendipity
- you are more goal-driven than process-driven
- you don’t think like a Pro
- you are not agile enough
- you do not self-promote
- you are not investing in yourself
- you have not clearly set your definition of success
- you are not in charge
Let’s now delve into each one of them.
You are not using your unfair advantage.
It’s most of the time easier to think of your unfair disadvantages in life (also known as excuses) than to think of your unfair advantages. So perhaps, you are not successful because you are not exploiting your exclusive competitive advantage. As cliche as it may sound, each one of us is unique in that the sum of all our experiences, circumstances, skills, and qualities will never be replicated by someone else. And being unique means having something different to offer. Maybe not earth-shatteringly different but enough to make a difference in one’s experience.
An unfair advantage can be a mix of your experiences, what you know, what you can do, where you are, who your connections are, and other things you have access to. Couple that with a complementing opportunity or problem that your unique unfair advantage can solve. Look within you and then around you. If you’ve quit figuring out your passion, it’s time to figure out your unfair advantage. We all have it.
You are not working on the magic of Serendipity.
Wikipedia says “Serendipity is an unplanned fortunate discovery.” Sounds like a case of pure luck and therefore beyond our control, right? Wrong! Chances of that “unplanned discovery” occurring may be exponentially multiplied. This is by you increasing your probability to get discovered. This is not going to happen if you’re simply not out there. You’re brilliant but no one knows. You’re extremely capable but people can’t find you. You are not successful because you are keeping all your talent and amazing skills to yourself. Get out of your shell. There’s no shame in self-promotion. Do not limit your possibilities. Find out as many avenues as you can for others to “luckily” come across you. Sometimes, we just need a single discovery to break in.
You are more goal-driven than process-driven.
You are not successful because you are too obsessed with your goals and your goals alone. It’s important to understand exactly what you want to achieve but that alone won’t let you get anywhere. NBA players don’t simply focus on scores to win. They spend hours and hours on end training, studying their opponents, building on best practices, switching up techniques, and being strategic in their mix of players and game plans. This is applicable everywhere. Build intelligent systems and processes around you then follow them religiously. Constantly re-evaluate and iterate whenever needed based on what works and what does not work. Design your space in such a way that all barriers and obstacles are removed, and the idea of working is actually appealing. When you surround yourself with effective mechanisms, success just naturally happens. The bonus is, you get to enjoy the ride.
“You win if you remain faithful to the process. The process is testing you as well as teaching you. If you pass the test and learn the lessons, you get to go on to your next process. If you fail a test and quit rather than retake the test, the process spits you out.” – Robert Kiyosaki, Rich Dad Poor Dad
You don’t think like a pro.
You are not successful because you have an amateur mindset. Amateurs compete with others, pros strive to be the best version of themselves. Amateurs let their emotions get the best of them, pros focus on facts. Amateurs value external rewards such as constant validation and attention. Pros work on mastery. Amateurs give in to fears, pros show up, and take calculated risks. Amateurs think of everyone as a threat, pros help others and collaborate. Amateurs give up after a failure, pros bounce back and see failures as opportunities. Amateurs feed their ego, pros want results. Amateurs are short-sighted, pros have a vision. Amateurs are hyper-focused on goals, pros are obsessed with processes and systems that work. Don’t be an amateur. Be a pro.
You are all over the place.
A Jack of all trades, a master of none. This seems like an obvious one but people always find themselves in this situation. So maybe you are not successful because you are spread too thin. We only have limited resources – especially when it comes to our time and energy. So part of being successful is being able to wisely manage these resources in such a way that it’s efficient, effective, and scalable. No one says you can only be one thing. In fact, you can be a lot of things. However, given that you are asking yourself why you are not successful, it maybe means you’re not ready yet to become prolific. Build your knowledge and expertise on one thing. Then reach a certain level of mastery and a reasonable amount of sustainable success in that endeavor first before starting a new one. Pace yourself, set timelines, and if needed, work incrementally.
You are not agile enough.
You’re probably not succeeding because you are resistant to change. In this day and age where technology is king, people have a short attention span (understatement), and change is as rapid as it’s never been before, you have to be quick in adapting and recalibrating the soonest possible time. Thriving in change, and responding swiftly to its impact is a top-notch skill in becoming successful. Your game plan from last year may no longer be applicable today and as frustrating as that sounds, being stubborn won’t yield results.
You are not investing in yourself.
If you’re all too cocky with what you know and have no interest whatsoever in sharpening your knowledge and skills, then you know now very well why you are not successful. Competition is tough so why would anyone settle for anything less? You are your best investment. Needless to say, you gotta keep your competitive edge, or better yet, become an expert in your industry. Keep learning. Keep improving. Be humble and take feedback. Be in the know of what’s happening in the industry. Be a thought leader. Network with the right people. The moment you stop working on yourself is the time you become obsolete and dispensable – hardly the qualities of a successful person.
You are a difficult person.
Truth be told. You are not successful because no one wants to work with or for you. No matter how good you are at what you do, how impressive your credentials are, or how unique your propositions are, if you are a bad experience overall, no one would want to be associated with you. It’s possible that you’re not entirely a bad person, maybe someone who just needs to work on their soft skills. Well, it’s about time.
You have not set your definition of success.
You are not successful because you do not know what success means to you. Maybe in the eyes of many, you are already successful but in your eyes, you’re not because you simply don’t know what success looks like. This is fundamentally problematic because it’s hard to measure something you don’t have any criteria for. So before you start asking why you’re not successful, ask yourself first what success means to you – and why.
You are not in charge.
You are not succeeding simply because you are passive and not taking responsibility for your own success. You are content with being mediocre, you don’t take action, you’re not willing to put in the work, you let the noise distract you and you procrastinate. You blindly follow trends, you are not being authentic and you’re just waiting for luck to strike in your direction. You always think that time is in your favor, or it’s not the right time yet. Starting is always the hardest part but it’s also the most liberating. And once you’re past it, you’ll wonder why it even took you that long. Bottom line is, your success is your own accountability. No one is going to hand it to you. So if you want it, you bet you have to get it.
In conclusion, above are some of the reasons why you may be failing – at work or in life, in general. Of course, the levels of difficulty in achieving success or even the possibility of being successful, vary greatly depending on one’s circumstances and privileges (or the lack of it).
I hope this somehow clears the fog in your head. The good news is that you asking this question is already a very good indicator. It means you want to be successful and you want to know what you might need to work on. Successful people are curious, they ask questions, they challenge themselves, and they reflect. Now, it’s just a matter of deciding, getting started, and committing yourself to the journey toward success. Don’t forget me once you’re there. All the best, allies.
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